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How to Finger a Pussy

How to Finger a Pussy

Learning how to finger a pussy is a lot like learning how to pet a cat. When petting a cat, do you go in like a bulldog, clumsy, rough and loud? If so, things probably didn’t end up that great. In fact, it’s a sure fire way to get clawed in the face – you’re lucky if you still have your eyes. There’s a reason her nether regions are called a pussy. If you want one to like you, you’ve gotta know how to pet her, just right.

Before you even begin the petting, set the mood. Put down a blanket on the bed – she may ejaculate. Have lots of warm oil nearby. Sesame or coconut oil are generally good. Light some candles. Burn some incense. Dim the lights. Put on soft, sexy music. Take care of all of this for her. Set it up so that she feels relaxed and can surrender to you.

Don’t Force It

Now, release all expectations. Don’t expect her to cum. Don’t expect her to ejaculate. Don’t expect her to have sex with you after you’re done. Pussy massages are for her to relax, surrender and heal. That may include orgasms, but it may not. Sexual mastery is about going with the flow and knowing when to engage when to not, when to hold back, and when to go all in.

It may even include laughing, crying and screaming. Women’s vaginas store pain in them from life experiences and these will very likely be released during a pussy massage. The best thing that you can do is be there for her. Allow her to express any emotions that she needs to express. Allow her to heal. This will create trust in your relationship. When she can trust you, she’ll be able to surrender to you during sex. That’s when true sexual mastery happens between two individuals.

Invite her into the space that you have set up for her. Ask her to undress as much as she feels comfortable with and lie down. Put a pillow under her sacrum (small of her back) and have one for you to sit on as well. Sit down between her legs and put her legs over yours. Make sure you’re comfortable as well. Set your timer for an hour. You want at least this much time to massage her.

Putting Her on The Pedestal

Let her know that this time is for her and that she doesn’t need to feel any pressure to orgasm or be turned on or to please you in any way. And begin by touching her very gently and slowly. Go as slow as you possibly can. Touch her hair, her face, her neck, her breasts, her legs but not her pussy yet. Get her warmed up and comfortable with your touch. Learning how to finger a pussy is also about learning everything that leads up to it, including foreplay.

Then bring your hands to her inner thighs and firmly begin to massage there and bring your hands up to her vulva, the external area of her pussy, massaging there and also the inside of her hips. Release and relax this part of her body. Put oil on your hands and warm it between them. Move the palms of your hands in circles over her vulva with firm pressure. Bring your palms to her vulva and down the creases of her thighs and repeat this motion over and over. Do this for about ten minutes.

Getting Ready

Now you can ask her if she’s ready for penetration with your finger. Let her know that it’s ok to say no. Women have been pressured to say yes so many times that it may feel uncomfortable for her to say no. If she says no, then continue the massage on the outside of her body.

If she says yes, the gently begin to massage the outside of the entrance to her vagina. Pay attention to the piece of skin at the bottom of the entrance. Softly rub here for a few minutes. Then, when she is open and inviting you in, slip one finger inside of her about one inch inside. Bring it to the top wall, the belly side of her vagina. Begin to move your finger in a clockwise rotation inside of her vagina. Press in firmly but gently at 12:00, 3:00, 6:00 and 9:00 and continue this pattern as you very, very slowly go deeper within.

Remind her to keep breathing and release anything that comes up for her. Allow her to cry and make sounds or become orgasmic if that feels best to her. What women want is to know that they are free to express whatever feelings arise. If she’s feeling orgasmic, bring your finger to the top wall of her vagina about an inch down from her cervix and press in a repetitive motion up into this spot over and over.

Basking in The Post Glow

When you are both done, gently remove your finger and lay beside her and hold her or let her be alone if that’s what she prefers. When she’s ready, allow her to talk about how the experience was for her and you can also tell her how it was for you. If she doesn’t want to talk, don’t force her. And if this is the case, don’t feel like you failed or did something wrong. Sexual mastery and learning how to finger a vagina is about having confidence – so don’t doubt yourself. The case very well could be that she is just sensitive about discussing it.

For a more detailed explanation on how to finger a pussy to climax, with guided video and audio, checkout my online sex training video – Cum Together and Pussyology.

 
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