Porn can be great to learn a few new tricks, spice up the bedroom with your partner, or to blow off some steam. But you have to think of porn as a tool. Like a hammer. You can use a hammer to build a house, or you can use a hammer to break your hand. It all depends on using it properly.
Unfortunately, for a lot of men, porn has become a roadblock getting in the way of their personal, social, professional, and romantic lives. And for some of these men, it has even gone as far as what some consider to be porn addiction.
But how do you know when pornography has seriously started impacting your life? And more importantly, what are the downfalls and how can you solve them?
Porn Can Lower Your Ability To Get Turned On (Desensitization)
When it gets to the point where you are watching porn on a consistent basis, like multiple times a day or every day, it may influence your ability to get turned on without continuing to escalate the scene that you are watching and it often causes men to not be able to get turned on by the women that they are having sex with.
The images that you have been leaning on so heavily for arousal have created a new sensitivity threshold that you need to reach in order to get hard and ejaculate. This often leads to men not being able to get it up when the action gets going with someone in real life or to not be able to cum when they want to.
As a sex coach who has shown men all over the WORLD how to get hard whenever they want to, I want you to know that this condition doesn’t have to be lifelong. If you think you are dealing with this particular fallout from porn addiction and want to learn how to channel your sexual energy, and to once again be able to get turned on without porn, I can help.
Porn Sets Unrealistic Expectations
In addition to desensitization, porn can also create unrealistic expectations. And when these expectations aren’t met, in romantic or sexual scenarios, it can leave us feeling empty.
My sex classes for men help you focus on these very feelings. And help you develop an understanding and control of these feelings. There is no reason you should feel ashamed of a boner. There is no reason why you should feel empty after sex. And there is no reason why you should be afraid of approaching sexual encounters.
Porn might be great, but it’s not real life. At the end of the day, you need to be able to know how to turn on a woman like they actually want to be turned on. Not by what you see in pornography.
While porn can provide some good ideas, it’s best to think of it as entertainment rather than education on what can actually happen in the bedroom.
Bring Your Own Tricks
Instead, why don’t you show her some tricks? Not the upside-down 69 tongue triangle that you saw the other day. But some real tricks, like the ones I teach in my tantric sex classes for men.
If you want to learn the best positions for sex, I can show you what’s even better. If you want to learn how to last longer, I can guide you through practices to get there. And if you want to learn how to make her cum over and over again without stopping, then you’re in the right place.
Deconditioning Yourself From Porn
Men have very strong social conditioning around their sexuality, and pornography is a big piece of that. Most guys are masturbating to pornography from an early age. This results in huge conditioning in the male brain and body from having their early sexual experiences not be based on an actual human being.
It’s only been in the last 50-70 years that men are training their nervous system and body to orgasm and experience sex through the lens of being visual rather than sensory. Watching porn (visual) instead of actually have sex (sensory).
As a result, you develop an idealized portrait of the human body and become fixated on the idea of perfect sex rather than real sex.
So there is an unwinding of male sexual conditioning when they start to get back into their five senses, get out of perfected sex ideals and get into reality and connection with other human beings. The somatic connection and embodiment in my sex coaching practices unwind this conditioning and get you back on the level that can connect with someone in real life.
Want to learn more about tantric sex and what it takes to become a sexual beast? Check out my blog and podcast for tons of free information on sexual mastery.
